I liked a guy, for almost 3 years (or maybe I should say 'was in love with'),
and had my heart broken harssshly, multiple times by him.
I finally, was able to move past that, forgive and move on with my life. Completely. Which was a big accomplishment.
But what I have noticed lately, is that it has scarred me no matter if im over it or not, it has shaped the way I deal with people I like now.
I will begin to 'crush' on someone, but will try my best not to. I will assume the worst, just in case the worst does happen. If I get past that, I begin to like the person. I won't tell anyone, because that way if he breaks my heart, then I can pretend i never did like him in the first place. I will constantly argue over wether I really 'like' them or not, and give a million excuses. It tends to not go much farther, because Im too afraid to make it do just that. Im too afraid of being hurt as much as I have before....but I need to move past that.
So, it's time I do.